Tuesday 15 February 2011

Confession Of a Blogger.....



Its been more than two years since I started writing over this screen. And now its time to think why should i write all this crap over here, because this is going to be a bit serious for me from know. so i need to review and analyse what was my intention at various levels. let me try to summarize it down here.

24th march 2009 : I started blogging by posting my first one over the blog, by this statement it never mean that i already finished 9999 post which is damn famous around the world and and i am not here for an autobiography. But still there was myth on my mind that one day my stupid blog can be famous all over the earth and there will mass gatherings wherever i go and the top schools will call me for their student interaction session. i dreamed because there is no taxation on dreaming all over the UK. The tax rebate on dreaming can be viewed as the major similarity among almost all countries except the hubs of great Don like 'osamaji' or 'ladanji' ( who hate bathing and who use the same costumes from the time being he started acting) where dreams of individuals are designed by their respective organisations and each individuals death calender will be available free for them whenever or wherever.

And so i dreamed. Fame, girls, money and more ahh!!! i reached heavens. Something on which i keep on having dispute with God is on dreams. I always used to dream like a common man. i never dreamed to become the mafia leader who can take the whole world on his finger tips, but a poor, innocent and honest celebrity with millions of fans (girls got a bit preference) around the stage, and pounds on my bank statements. God always used to think that i am over ambitious and greedy and always rejected my proposed dreams, and i keep on sending it back as forward messages with a hope that one day his personal or admin staff will give a sanction accidentally.

But there was another important motive behind this blog which was truly harmless and the one of the best intention, and it was to impress a girl. Please note that the word impression got only one meaning and synonyms like flirting or ogling are completely inappropriate. This was actually a forced situation for almost all guys. i can state that it was not my fault to start a blog in order to impress a girl, but the current situations demand so.
Take the case of Facebook or any other social network. Consider a social network without having any girls on it, you can't imagine of it as the website will get shut before it's birth.Boys join there with an innocent intention of meeting some nice girl over there, but all the girls will destroy his dreams by updating their status to 'in a relationship' or 'engaged'. he won't give up and will again keep on trying. Even if he upload the worlds best status ever on his profile he is forced to get 2 'likes' and '1' or '1 n a half' comments. Still he will post his comments and update his 'likeness' among with other 40 or 50 likes and 35 comments on a girls post which state that ' she got fever and diarrhea'. A girl will upload her blur image took someone who does't clicked a photo before and will receive 40 - 50 comments and 'likes' on it, but if a boy upload a superb picture which express the excellence of his photographic skills..."damn who gonna look that!!!"

In other words this problem is actually a natural phenomenon. During 18th and late 19th century girls weaved a fashion trend where boys with a belly and a fluffy face were assumed to be wealthy and can be considered for marriage. At that period boys struggled with different food products and eat day and night to gain some extra pounds and a fluffy face, but the girls cheated them by a sudden shift of trend towards six pack abs from 20th century. This made boys to starve via heavy dieting and wasting almost all the day in the corner of a gym dreaming a six pack and two extra balls on their arms. Thanks for all the girls for not shifting to a trend of nudeness so that now at least all the boys can cover the whole body. But we still doesn’t have any critics on female fashion which is so close to the nature by reducing the maximum of cloth from it, because of the fact that we really enjoy it and hope that they will come up with more nature friendly fashion.

Poor boys!!!!

It is also a myth that girls are in front for spending on beauty products despite the real truth that on the back stage boys are draining their pockets on cosmetic products, protein powders and even car cooling films in order to keep their skin safe so as to get accepted by some girl if they got a chance. Anyway we need to accept that the fact that truth is always hidden!!!

So as an individual and as a boy I am forced to start a blog to impress a girl.

This was actually a means for a pretty show off and also to convince her that ‘yeh baby! I am a true genius’. To an extent that attempt can be stated as successful because she did read my blog (hurray!!) but still I don’t know why she deleted me from her profile and even stopped her blog right after that, and I made an assumption that poor understanding in English language might be a reason for that (thank God for not making her to report abuse and thrashing my whole dream).


2010 Brush Up: After the failure of my first intention as a blogger I didn't wrote anything for a while. And I started again. This time the motivation behind it was different. Because the more you play harder in life, the more you become serious and cool towards it at same time. My experience taught me that waiting with a pug dog face for the impression of a girl is useless and there are lot of things you need to spend your time on like inventing new abusive language to call your manager on your mind, having new contract phones and sending them back before the 14 day period and spending a pound a day on national lottery with an unclear ray of hope and visiting almost all shops and super markets for the best beer deals etc. This new view towards the life forced me to start my blog again. This time i thought i can try to view the whole world through my philosophy any write something worth, something which has a moral that can throw a spear straight to the readers mind. But still someone inside my mind use to tell that it may or may not lead me to my above described dreams (but as always i do, i never gave my ears to that!!)

However i altered my above theory of life after a party night. It is OK to get your life harder, but if it gets too harder, it won’t be that cool. For example, if you got so much drunk, you lose your watch on the street and you slept on an underground train and your manager call you on 7’o clock to ask why u didn't came for the shift starting 6’o clock. You , the cool guy will answer ‘who the hell are you, i am lost and i don’t even know where i am standing now, just hang the phone and mind your business’, without knowing the fact that there is a gift of one week suspension waiting for you, even after realizing the stupid manager never use to polish his shoes on an attempt to fall on his feet!. All i need to write is that something like this instance can blow off the writer inside you and that burning spirit which give you a wrong motivation that you can make the world stand still on your finger tips.

2011 A New Beginning: Two years of great balanced experience with more failures and less success taught me that the blog is for nothing but to narrate whatever you experienced in your life, your imaginations, your dreams, your anger, stories and whatever you want to shout out to the world, and blessed if you have plenty of free time; so I am on it, without having any crooked funny intentions, as a plain human being.......